Is Couple’s Therapy for you? (Discernment Counselling)

You may be wondering if Couples Therapy is right for you in your situation right now.

Sometimes one partner is ‘leaning out’ of the relationship and is unwilling to try couple therapy, whilst the other is ‘leaning in’ and wants to work on restoring the relationship. This is very tough emotionally and couple therapy is not an option where the two partners have a mixed agenda.

However, Discernment Counselling has been designed for just such couples.

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What is Discernment Counselling?

It is a specific short-term counselling approach that offers you a chance to slow down, take a breath, and look at the three options for your relationship path going forward.

Discernment Counselling will help you decide

  • Whether to stay as you are and not take action,
  • Whether to separate/divorce and
  • Whether to move towards couple therapy, for a fixed period

The focus of Discernment Counselling is for you to gain clarity and confidence about your decision to pursue one of these three directions for your relationship.

The process of discerning this decision is based on gaining a deeper understanding of how your relationship ended up in this place, and its possibilities for the future.

The goal is NOT to solve your relationship problems at this stage, but to discern whether you might both become willing to work on solving them in couple therapy at the end of Discernment Counselling.

You will each be treated with compassion and respect, no matter what you are feeling about your relationship at the moment, and regardless of your final choice of path. A Discernment Counsellor does not have an agenda, except to make sure that no stone is left unturned as you seek to discern your best decision for the future.

You will each gently be challenged to take responsibility for what you have brought to the situation, and how you may have contributed to this current impasse, so that you might both learn from your pain.

How Discernment Counselling is different from Couple Therapy

  • You will come in as a couple, but the most important work occurs in one-on-one conversations with Andrea, our discernment counselling specialist, as the two of you will be starting from different places
  • It is short term in nature, a maximum of 5 sessions, at the end of which you may transition into time limited couple therapy if that becomes a mutual decision.

Therapy Reviews

Help With Bereavement & Depression
I was coping with a major bereavement and it felt like a crisis… Straight away Maggie was warm, kind and understanding… I didn’t want to be in therapy for a long time, I just wanted to get better, get on with my life… I cannot recommend Maggie highly enough to you. Whilst life still presents me with challenges I can cope with them as I feel so much stronger now… over six weeks… after each session I’d… Read More
TV Director, London
Overcoming Career Anxiety & Work Stress
I had never thought I was someone who would need counselling or therapy, as I had always been very strong. However when my career wasn’t going quite as I had planned it, I found I was becoming very negative and mentally spiralling out of control – in fact turning myself into a victim. Maggie was outstanding at providing me with what I needed, not as a “quick fix” but by giving me the tools to use whenever I may need… Read More
Corporate Finance Lawyer
Empower Yourself – Building Self Confidence
Before meeting with Maggie, I had been feeling demotivated, lacking focus and very lonely…. Counselling was something I only considered when I felt there was nothing I could do. Retrospectively, this was incorrect. Maggie gave me support and provided me with the encouragement to empower myself to change. I had always found it hard to deal with questions, getting defensive. Maggie’s questions…helped me… I now realise… Read More
Investment Banker
Discovering Enjoyable Career Success & Creating Loving Relationships
When I came to see Maggie I was very depressed, but also very cynical about the benefits of seeing a therapist… I was working as a sales director… which I thought was what I wanted, but I had very little confidence in my abilities… I also had very bad relationships… Maggie has helped me to understand why… and…to turn things around so that I am so much happier now than I have been in many, many, years and… Read More
Ex Sales Director
Ensuring You Get the Right Therapist

The following feedback is from a client who we provided with a therapist re-match:

Just wanted to say, amazing pick with Kate. Very happy with the switch.
I am loving my therapy and making progress already after 3 sessions.
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Entrepreneur, London
Overcoming Anxiety & Work Stress – Improving Career & Relationships
After a number of false starts with therapists, I can only say that I wish I had found Maggie sooner!… Over a period of 15 years I had seen multiple therapists and psychiatrists to address issues relating to anxiety, depression and workplace stress…. Maggie really helped me to elucidate and articulate the origins of deeply embedded patterns of negative and self defeating thinking, which proved essential… Read More
Dan, Civil Servant
Empower Yourself – Overcome Trauma & Build Self-Esteem
I came to Judy struggling to understand the impact sexual abuse that had taken place in my childhood had had on me. I knew there were things… weaving their way into how I formed relationships and the way I have behaved since I was a teenager, but I didn’t know what they were or how to deal with them. The hours I’ve spent working with Judy have been the most…liberating and empowering experience and I’ve learnt… Read More
Magazine Editor, London
Overcome ME/CFS Long Covid & Build Confidence
…Thank you to KlearMinds for taking such care in matching me with the right therapist…. I started sessions when I was very unwell with Long Covid/ ME/CFS… Amanda was a huge part of my recovery… I’ve got my life back. I’ve just been for a run, am a Mum to my boys again and am loving life. The connection between my mental health and physical health were much more entwined than I had realised. Amanda helped me to… Read More
Jenny, Occupational Therapist from North England.
Flexible therapy that worked best for me
Had a very positive experience working with Kate and KlearMinds. Kate was very easy to talk to and gave me space to do sessions in the way that worked best for me and I came out of them feeling refreshed and motivated. I would definitely recommend Kate…. she was kind, thoughtful and always reliable, even when I was a bit awkward about finding times that suited my schedule. Read More
Professional, IT Sector
Career Coaching & Finding Loving Relationship
I started to see Maggie as a work coach… I was frustrated with my job… working myself into the ground… not getting any returns… I’m now in a job I love, and have just been promoted! I’m now much more confident… with who I am…. in a great relationship for almost two years now… I’ve recommended her to numerous friends since and I know she’s helped them massively too… She helped me realise…. Read More
Managing Director
Control Anxiety – Depression – Improve Relationships – Career Coaching
…therapy with Judy… has changed my life forever. I suffered daily from anxiety and.. negative thought[s].. holding me back..in my relationships… during lockdown..i was put at risk of redundancy.. I saw 3 different therapists before this, none of which really understood and helped me… Judy helped me understand things… control my anxiety… get back on track… I was blown away with her….Read More
Events Producer
Build Self-Confidence and Overcome Relationship Problems
….I had tried counselling before and thought it wasn’t for me. I now realise that finding the right counsellor makes all the difference. I went to see Maggie when I felt I was no longer able to cope and everything in my life was going wrong…. I cannot recommend Maggie enough. I feel in control, grounded and confident… capable of moving forward in my life. My sessions with her have not only helped me gain…. Read More
A very grateful Lawyer!
Overcoming Trauma, Depression, Parenting problems, Career Issues
I have seen Maggie for a short batch of sessions, on 4 occasions… I’ve needed help with…post-natal depression…childhood trauma…career…work/life balance…parenting struggles… the services she provides, have been absolutely transformational… Without fail, each time, Maggie has..quickly distilled..the root..issue..and given me highly..actionable..advice..I can…use..long past attending one to one sessions…. Read More
COO, London
Maggie Award Winning Therapist

Not Sure Which Therapist Or Type Of Therapy You Need?

Get in touch with Maggie Morrow, Award Winning Therapist & KlearMinds Director. Maggie can help match you with the right therapist based on your needs.

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Contact us to find out more about Discernment Counselling and to book an appointment with us today

Have you had enough of feeling stressed or anxious and feel ready to change your life for the better? A KlearMinds London City based CBT and anxiety counsellor can help you regain control of your life. Why not contact us today and take the first step to improve your life.

Andrea Tibbitts - Relationship Therapist and Couple Coach in London
Author: Andrea Tibbitts, Relationship Therapist & Couple Coach
Last updated: March 17th, 2023

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We help people across London and have therapy rooms in Central London & London City.

Quality Standards

Our hand-selected therapists have trained in the UK’s most respected counselling institutions. They hold a minimum of 8 and up to 30 years clinical experience within the NHS, private and/or charitable sectors in and around London. They are registered with: